Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
