is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
How many fucks given?
0.12846
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize