i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
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