Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
