seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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