I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
this is an emotional support booty call
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
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