I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
