Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize