Your tits are I can't wait for
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
