one two three fourrrrnication!
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
