Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
