She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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