Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
