Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
