Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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