We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
