You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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