her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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