Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
