when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize
