I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize