Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
