24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
