So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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