i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I need to stop coming to work sober
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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