Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
