I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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