margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I smell like Dick and happiness
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