Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize