I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
someone owes me an orgasm
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
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