Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize