And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Randomize