do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
