We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize
