i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Randomize
