I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
