She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I pour the whiskey from now on
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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