you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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