I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Randomize
