nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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