Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Randomize