there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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