I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Dignity is for republicans.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
