great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Success! We fucked roommates!
Randomize
