If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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