it hurts more in the daytime
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize
