U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
