I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
