she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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