Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
