That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
