Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
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